Life changes
by Jabema
Summary: AU, Dean is homeless and misses his little brother Sam, who hates him. He screwed up his family s life and lives to redeem himself to Sam. His life changes when he meets Castiel, a man, who sees what Dean can t see. #Destiel and #DeanAndSamBrothers


**Hey Guys :) This is my first Supernatural and first Fanfic I write in english. It is not my mother tongue so please forgive me for mistakes. Maybe there is someone out there who`s first language is english and wants to Beta read it? I would be quite thankfull for it!**

 **My Intention is to make it a very long fanfic, just for your knowledge.**

 **Have Fun !**

 **Jabema :)**

It was raining. Again. Seemed like Dean wasn`t lucky this summer. Although it was nice to get cooled down it was difficult at the same time to keep your stuff dry. Dean grabbed his backpack which almost fell apart these days and followed the now wet rails back to some shelter. He had tried to leave this small town but now his plans must be cancelled. Bismarck was too far away and Dean wouldn`t let his stuff getting wet because of that. So, he made his way back and tried to enjoy this summer rain at least. Sometimes the hot summer was pretty tough when you lived on the streets with now possibilities to cool down but also nice because you didn`t have to worry about rain as you had to in fall or winter. As he was thinking he didn`t know what he preferred.

Luckily, he hadn`t walked far into the land so he was back at the railway station in no time and sat down on one of the chairs and waited for the rain to stop.

It was a mistake to leave Bismarck and coming back to Sioux Falls. He didn`t quite know what he was hoping to find but he had to admit living in a big city was easier than in a small town. Of course, there were other homeless who sometimes stole your stuff but there was more food and more jobs which were the most important things in Dean Winchester`s everyday life. Moreover, in Sioux Falls he had to fear meeting Sam on the streets and he wasn`t ready for it yet. Also, Dean was pretty sure that Sam wouldn`t want to meet him ever again in his entire life. Still Dean missed him, but this part of his life was over, so he should just deal and get over with it.

A few weeks back he decided to change the city after his earned money was stolen and his missing of Sammy got too big. Goddammit he missed his little brother. Every day and every minute. Now it was only an hour of walking and Dean would be able to hug him or even just see him. Nevertheless, his dreams hadn`t made it. He came to this town but his life hadn`t changed. Dean was still Dean and hadn`t talked to Sam. He was alone.

Right now, it was enough for Dean to know that Sam was close by. It was all he would ever get.

Dean shook his head. Since when was he such a whiny baby? Relieved he realized that it had stopped raining. He got up, grabbed his backpack and left the station which wasn`t a pleasure because of all the restaurants he passed by. His stomach was empty and he had no money left. Normally, he would have worked by now but his trip to Sioux Falls prevented it.

As he was glancing at the food to both of his sides he hasn`t realized that a man passed his way, so they collapsed. Dean reeled back a few steps and saw that the man had carried a back with groceries which content now laid on the floor.

"I`m sorry", Dean said honestly and kneeled to help the man collecting his things.

"Oh no problem, really. I am sorry as well", the man said friendly and gave Dean a smile.

Then Dean saw it. A wallet was laying next to a big cauliflower. Dean could grab it and this man wouldn`t realize it.

Before he could think further he already grabbed it and put it in his jacket. He helped with the rest and then they stood up. The man was probably a little older than Dean was, had black hair, was a little smaller than him and still smiled brightly.

"Thank you for helping me."

"Yeah sure", Dean mumbled holding the stolen wallet in his jacket pocket. He had to leave ASAP before this guy was realizing what had happened.

Without looking back Dean passed him and hurried through the crowd outside. He followed a side street and hid behind a garbage can. Insecurely he looked back, but nobody seemed to have followed him.

With a shaking hand he got the wallet out and opened it. He couldn`t hold back a moan. Dean was holding 400 dollars in his hands and considering that this guy already bought groceries it was even more impressive. Instantly Deans mind drifted off to what he could do with this amount of money, but he stopped himself. No, he couldn`t keep it. He knew he made a quick decision back there, but it was wrong. He didn`t want to be thief. His mother hadn`t raised him that way and it wasn`t this stranger`s fault that Dean fucked up his and others lives.

So Dean turned around but stopped suddenly. He couldn`t go back in case that the guy called the police which was probably the case considering the 400 dollars in Deans jacket. No, that wouldn`t be the best of ideas.

Now Dean searched the wallet for a name or an address and fortunately Dean found the man`s ID which said Castiel Novak and his address. _What a strange name._

Dean sighed annoyed. He had no clue where this place was and he had no possibility to find it. Probably he could go to an internet café but this small town surely hadn`t one.

Then it came to Deans mind.

He went back to the main street and searched for a friendly looking person. There she was, a small woman in her 40s. He went to her straightly and tapped on her shoulder, so she turned around, looked at him interested and asked: "Yes?"

"Excuse me? My phone is broken and I really, really need to find this address, would you look it up for me, please?" By saying this he put on his brightest smile which nobody could resist. Again, Dean was thankful for his appearance that saved him more often than he could count. Dean was tall, and good looking. Everything he needed in his life.

"Sure darling" she said. So, he showed her the little piece of paper and shortly afterwards she held out her cellphone so that Dean could take a look. Because Dean usually didn`t live here he wasn`t quite sure where this place was exactly but at least he knew the direction now. It must be outside of the town, probably a whole house and no flat which he had expected considering that the guy hadn`t seemed much older than him.

"Thanks, really."

Dean decided that he would go to him right away. Maybe he was lucky and this guy hadn`t realized the missing wallet yet and no police was involved. Dean was still underage and so a missed child and had no interest in contact with the police.

As for the fact that Sioux Falls was a small town he reached the wanted street in no time. Astonished he looked at the houses to his left and right. They were big and fancy houses with huge gardens. Once he had lived in a house as well. It might not had been like these, but it had been his home and the best part of his life. Sammy, mom and John were there, and they were happy back then. Now he was alone.

 _Stop_

What was wrong with him today?

He fixed his gaze back on the sidewalk which was like every other sidewalk in the US. Soon he had to look up again to find the right house by paying attention to the numbers.

"12, 13, 14, 15", Dean mumbled until he has reached number 16. Castiel Novak`s house. It was just as impressive as the others in this neighborhood, but he really liked this best. It was snow-white with huge and open windows. As he was thinking he realized this house didn`t really look American but rather European. It had a great garden at the front and probably also at the back but it couldn`t be seen from the street.

Now the only thing that kept Dean from Castiel was a big fence. Should he climb over it, or ring the bell?

Probably ring the bell considering that he has stolen this man`s purse today. Insecure he pushed the button and waited patiently. It took like forever but then Castiels voice sounded out of the speaker: "Yes?"

"Ahm, hello. We met today at the station and I…want to give you something back."

Those was probably not the best choice of words but Castiel answered: "oh ok. I`m coming."

Dean heard a buzzing sound and assumed that Castiel had opened the gate. He pushed down the handle and indeed he could open it. Slowly he followed the path to the front door and admired the beautiful front garden. He discovered many different flowers and even a fountain. Jealousy came up in his mind and he tried to push it down. The evil part of him regretted coming here, considering that this guy was rich as fuck probably and so wouldn`t miss his 400 dollars, but then again at least his conscience would be clean afterwards.

"Hello", Castiel simply said and Dean looked up surprised. He had been deep in thoughts and hadn`t recognized him. Castiel was standing in front of him in the same outfit he had worn back at the station, which was a suit and a trench coat. He must have just come back home.

"Sorry, I was just admiring your garden." Dean could hear that he was nervous and ashamed. So he tried small talk but Castiel didn`t answer but only followed Deans gaze.

"I am not sure why you are here?"

Dean looked back at him. Strangely he didn`t seem angry, just confused which was understandable if he hadn`t missed his wallet yet. Although he had been friendlier back at the station but Castiel probably just was wondering about Deans cause of visit. _So straight to the point._

"As I said I want to give you something back." By saying that he pushed his hand in the jacket, grabbed the wallet and held it out to Castiel who seemed confused at first but then turned angry. He grabbed the purse and made a few steps back.

"You stole it."

"Yes, and I am sorry for that, honestly." Dean didn`t know what to do with his hands, so he put them back in his jacket pockets and avoided Castiels glance. Why was he so emotional right now? It is not like he never did illegal stuff, in fact he was doing those on an everyday basis. Maybe it was because Castiel seemed to be a nice man who didn`t deserve to be treated like this.

"Why shouldn`t I call the police?"

Scarred Dean looked up again and almost couldn`t stand Castiels stare.

"Actually, you probably should but I hope you won`t and just for your knowledge you would probably do me a favor by doing so because then I was able to sleep in a bed tonight so… I don`t know. I guess they won`t catch me anyway `cuz I`d be gone when they arrive."

Cas tilted his head slowly to his left side and his anger changed to pity. Great, Dean hated pity.

"You are homeless, aren`t you?" Castiel said with a much softer voice than before.

"Bingo" Dean answered sorrowfully.

Castiel didn`t react to that statement, so Dean expected this occasion to be over and walked back to the gate.

"Wait!"

Dean turned around and found Castiel right in front of him. He was holding out the 400 dollar and smiled at him.

"Take the money."

Shortly Dean was surprised and happy but then he regained his senses. What was he thinking?

Of course, like a stranger was giving him money, sure. As if so many people had been nice to him before. He knew how it worked for sure. Certainly, he wasn`t clever but not this stupid.

Dean glanced to both sides and then approached.

"Ok, what do you want?"

He was back to being full business. That is what he wanted in fact, or rather what he needed. He hated it. He hated what it was doing to him, but he had no choice. He just had to stop being all whiny today and prepare himself for what was about to happen. His hands were shaking slowly so he made fists. Great, today was a really bad day, but he couldn`t freak out now, or the money would be gone.

"Nothing, what would I want?"

That was more than surprising and confusing. Dean frowned and searched for the glimpse of a lie in the mans face, but it was full of helpfulness and honest confusion about Deans question. _Pity,_ said a small voice in Deans head again _._

"No thanks", Dean said more angrily than he intended. This man wanted to help but Dean would never, _never_ be somebody you need to pity. "Keep you compassion man, I`m fine."

He wasn`t fine, but he didn`t deserve this money either as a present.

So he turned around to finally leave for his own good, but was stopped again, this time by a touch on his right arm. Dean jumped and turned around, prepared to fight back. Nobody touched him without his permission, otherwise he couldn`t bear any touches.

"I`m sorry" Castiel said, holding out his hands defensively. Dean wanted to spit back some mean words but Castiel really looked sorry, so Dean reminded himself that it was just a man who tried to be nice and had no knowledge about his life.

"I didn`t mean to scare you-"

"I am not scared!" He was nearly screaming and shaking of anger.

"I am sorry", Castiel repeated regretfully and Dean calmed down. It was something about Castiels that relaxed Dean immediately but he couldn`t quite find the reason. Was it his voice? , wondered he. Cas seemed to be no threat, rather like a trustworthy person.

"Are you…hurt?", asked Castiel worriedly, pointing at Deans arm.

Dean followed his sad gaze and saw that he was rubbing his arm thoughtlessly. For that he had rolled up his sleeve and it revealed a long, fresh cut he got from a job a few days back. It was nobody should see and he definitely didn`t want to think about it. Hastily he hid his arm under his sleeve again.

"It is nothing. I am fine."

"Are you sure? Looks pretty painful. Also I am scarred that it will get infected if you don`t take care of it-"

"I said I am fine!"

That made Castiel stop talking but he still was looking at Deans covered arm with a worried frown. He kind of reminded Dean of - of what? - a puppy?

Dean really had to go. He couldn`t bear it anymore.

"What do you want?", Dean forced out.

"What is your name?", Castiel asked politely.

That caught Dean out of guard. His first intention was not to answer but then he just did.

"Dean, its`s Dean." He didn`t know why he had told him, but Castiel was worth it. No one in like forever had cared that much for him that they even bothered to wonder what his name was.

Castiel seemed relieved that he didn`t scream again which almost made Dean smile.

"Ok Dean, my name is Castiel and you don`t have to live like that. I would be happy if you came in with me."

Dean became stiff right away. "No!"

Castiel looked disappointed about that but Dean had no idea why. Why would he be disappointed? Except… but something told Dean that Castiel was different.

"Ok I understand, but then please take some food, water and medicine, wait for me, I`ll grab some things for you."

Castiel was making his way back into his house excitedly but now it was Deans turn to stop him.

"No. I don`t need your food or water or your pity."

Castiel paused for a moment and seemed to be thinking.

"This has nothing to do with pity-"

"Sure it does. You pity me, don`t you dare saying something else. Just to make it clear: I am fine. I am fine on my own and I don`t need your money or whatever." At the end Dean had growled. This man didn`t deserve this treatment, Dean knew that, but he couldn`t stop himself.

With one last look at the sad Castiel, he turned around and left this time for real. He could hear Castiel saying something but he didn`t care. He had to leave. Now.

After closing the gate, he hurried his walk just to bring as much space between him and this man as possible. But where should he go?

Suddenly he felt a tear in his left eye and he wiped it away instantly. Why had he come back? He should have kept the money and wouldn`t had ended up like this. What has just happened? He never cried. John made sure that he never cried. Men don`t cry. Still, he felt more tears to come and he hated it.

Desperate he looked up to the sky and blinked them away.

 _Sammy._

Dean didn`t know why but he came into his mind. He had to see his little brother. This wish was constantly nagging at him but he couldn`t hold it back anymore now. It felt like the need to breath.

Before his reasonable self interfered he chose the roads to Bobby Singers home.

At 10 pm. Dean slowly approached the familiar house. _Bobby Singer._ Dean hasn`t seen him for years and this had to stay like this. No one should discover him although there wasn`t anyone to see him at this time. Bobby and Sam must be inside the house and except for them there was no one around. Nevertheless, it wasn`t dark yet, so he payed special attention.

Dean saw light coming out of the window of the living room. Quietly he creeped right under the open window and sat down. He wasn`t sure if he was able to peek into the room without getting caught. He shouldn`t risk it, he thought. At least not as long as the window was open and he able to eavesdrop. So he listened carefully and there it was. Sam`s voice which he hadn`t heard for years. "Sammy", Dean whispered to himself.

"-don`t know Bobby. He just doesn`t stop", Sam said sadly," and then the others also pick on me. Just because I study a lot. Is something wrong with this?"

Dean tensed up right away. After years of no contact, the first thing he was learning about Sam was that he was bullied. Great.

"Hell no, Sam. Don`t let those Idjits in your brain. If you keep those grades you will be accepted in Stanford or something after graduation."

Bobby, as gruffy as Dean remembered. He couldn`t prevent a smile. He had known that Bobby was the right choice for Sam`s guardian.

"And what am I supposed to do?", asked Sam desperately," I mean, I get it. I am that weirdo without family."

"Hey, and what am I? A dog or something?"

Sam laughed at this. "You know Bobby, actually I`d consider a dog as family."

"Then you`ll get a dog. See?! Your family just grew by plus one."

This talk made Dean at the same time sad but also happy.

"Seriously Sam. They are stupid and don`t let that bother you. Show them that it doesn`t bother you! Or…well, I am certainly not saying that you should punch them or something but well maybe you should punch them or something. Show them that you are strong and not afraid which you are."

Dean couldn`t be happier about this advice. Bobby was a good father figure. Certainly, Dean couldn`t have asked for someone better than him.

"-and now kiddo it`s bedtime! I`ll be right up."

That was when Dean stopped listening and risked peeking into the room. Sam`s back was turned towards him as he left the room. He was just as tall as Bobby was and that meant something for a 13-year old. Bobby was certainly no short man. The last thing Dean could make out was that Sam`s hair got long, well not chick long but neither short. Bobby looked the same as always which was reassuring for Dean. Like coming home.

Suddenly his stomach was making a loud noise and he panicked. Before they could discover him, he crawled back into a bush and hoped that nobody had heard his stomach. Excited he hold his breath and waited. Stupid stomach and stupid hunger. He hadn`t eaten anything today. Unfortunately, Bobby must really had heard him. He came to the window, opened it wildly and looked around. He looked the same as Dean remembered. Gruffy, old and like teddy bear, friendly and kind at the same time.

All he wanted right now was to reveal himself to Bobby but he couldn`t. Nevertheless, it was really, really damn hard to stay hidden. After a minute Bobby must have decided that he had been mistaken, closed the window and disappeared from Dean`s view.

A few seconds Dean stared at the place where Bobby had disappeared before he shook his head and left the bush. Carefully he headed back from this house, but nobody cared for him anyway. Bobby and Sam hadn`t recognized him and apart from them there was nobody nearby.

Fortunately, it was a nice and warm summer night so it wouldn`t actually matter where Dean slept tonight, so he just kept going away from them. He watched the sky and found it clear with many stars and the moon to see. Dean was happy.

Although he hadn`t spoken with the only two people he considered his family but could hear and see them which was everything he got right now, so he enjoyed it. Sammy's hair got longer, it still fascinated Dean. Of course, Dean thought, he has become a teenager, must be a fashion statement. That thought made Dean smile. Not only his hair got longer but also Sam himself. Dean was tall, but he could easily imagine Sam outgrowing him one day. Not like he would actually live to see that but he liked the idea. Probably he wouldn`t make it any longer than a few years anymore. He always imagined getting killed one day but oddly he made it to his 17th. Maybe he would get old enough to be able to pull himself out of this life. But those were only ifs and maybes. Right now, he had no money, no job, but hunger. He had to find an opportunity, as Dean preferred to call it, tomorrow. Hopefully there were people in this town who needed Deans kind of work. Thankfully nobody knew him here, so it might was possible to make it in this town. But Dean didn`t want to think about this now. All he wanted was to enjoy the memory of Sam and Bobby. Nobody and no kind of thought could take this from him.

As he was walking down the path he knew immediately that he wouldn`t leave this town anymore. He needed to stay close to Bobby and Sam. If this was all he could get from life he would gladly take some sneak peeks of them from time to time.

Also, those kids bullying Sammy would get what they deserved. Sam`s life was bad enough that he didn`t need stupid other kids to make it worse. When Dean had arrived in Sioux Falls he came by a school which hopefully was Sam`s. Dean could go there tonight and watch in the morning if Sam would enter the building. _That sounded like a plan._

It took Dean like forever this night, but he really found the school. By now it must have been like 1 am. This hopefully was Sam`s school. It was huger than he remembered so it was quite possible that this was the only school in town. Suddenly Dean had to smile. It was realistic that he was seeing his little brothers school at the moment. Sam loved going to school and studying and all that stuff Dean hated. They were very different but always got along. Or rather always had gotten along. That time was over.

He sighed and looked for a sheltered place where he could spend the night and was in the position to watch the entry in the morning. Luckily across the street was an office building in which he could be hiding and watching. Nobody would recognize him, or more importantly Bobby and Sam wouldn`t recognize him.

So, Dean decided to sleep in a side street, and when the sun was rising, he would get up and walk over to the office building which opened at 7 o`clock as the sign said.

Dean put down his backpack, opened it and looked for some leftovers. His only food was one half of an apple which was eaten faster than he liked. Dean was still hungry, but he was used to it. Tomorrow he would go working, hopefully. Sometimes he found a possibly and sometimes he didn`t.

To lessen the hunger for now he drank one and a half bottles of water he filled at the local river today. It wasn`t the healthiest thing but often he didn`t have a choice. `Well, I certainly won`t die`, Dean thought bitterly. After that he felt full which was all he could ask for right now. He stuffed them back and lay down. It was a hard concrete, and normally he preferred a softer ground like in the woods or under a bridge, but it would do it tonight.

Next morning, he was woken rudely. Some kids were passing him by, screaming. Dean scrambled to his feet and shook off his confusion. _Sammy_. That was his goal for today.

He grabbed his backpack and made his way back to the main road and entered the office building through a revolving door. The air was much cooler inside than outside and everything was clean as fuck. It was huge and many people in suits dwelled on in the entrance hall, so nobody should be recognizing him. Although he stuck out of the people in here, nobody hopefully had the time to ask him to leave.

He went to the windows and watched the school gate attentively. Already many students had reached the school and Dean checked the time annoyed. 7.43 am. Dammit, he overslept.

Now all he could do was wait and hope.

And Dean really was lucky. In like 5 minutes later, Bobby`s truck stopped in front of the school and Sam jumped out of the passenger's seat.

Immediately Dean smiled at Sam`s sight. He shifted his gaze to Bobby who looked at his direction at the same time. Shorter than a second, they were staring at each other and then Dean ran away. He ran trough the hall to the other side of the building and entered corridors he was not allowed to enter. He heard shouts towards him but he didn`t listen to them. Finally, he has found what he was looking for. An emergency exit.

He ran further and finally entered a supermarket where he surely would be safe. But first when he had hidden behind some shelves and caught his breath, he paused. Bobby had seen him. That was his worst case. Luckily, he regained consciousness immediately and ran as fast as he was able. Maybe Bobby thought he saw wrong. It was possible because Bobby`s eyes weren`t the best anymore. They hadn`t been that way when Dean talked to him last time at least.

Scarred Dean waited but Bobby didn`t appear so Dean thought it was safe to go back to school.

At 10 o`clock the schools recess started, and Dean watched out for Sam. As Dean was standing several feet away it was hard, but he discovered him. Sam was sitting under a tree, reading, when a boy walked up and grabbed his book. This had to be the lead bully because after that other boys followed him. Instantly Dean wanted to go help Sam but he didn`t do anything but making fists. This child would get what it deserved.

After school he waited for that kid to go home. When it came to that point that kid walked with two other boys and Dean followed them carefully. Which was kind of unnecessary because they wouldn`t pay attention to him even if he was wearing a button with: Going to kick your ass.

It didn`t take long until he was finally on his own with him. Dean fastened his walk, grabbed that smaller kid from behind and shoved it against a wall. Then Dean pulled out his knife and held it against that kid`s throat. His eyes widened panickily but Dean didn`t care. To be fair it was a bit extreme, but Dean wouldn`t have time and the opportunity to deal with him again if he wasn`t going to stop bullying Sam. So he decided to be the most terrifying thing that boy ever met.

"Hi, you are probably wondering what I want, so I make it quick. I know that puberty is an exciting time with all that hair growing on new places. The thing is boy, just because you can`t deal with it, doesn`t mean that other kids also deal with growing hair all day. The one boy who is so, so much cleverer than you are doesn`t like how you treat him. He prefers dealing with adult stuff. So, I tell you one time to stop it. You will go and tell him that you are sorry, understood? `Cuz if you don`t do that I will be back and that is a promise. That means that I had been thinking what to do to you. I thought `beating the shit out of that kid isn`t enough`. So I had decided that it would be more fun and more impressive if I messed with your brain."

If it wasn`t Dean talking he would call it crazy, but that was what his life has made of him. He couldn`t deal with any more shit and Sam has been the most important thing in Deans life since the day that kid was born. He would kill for him, so he did what he had to do to protect him.

The boy in front of him nodded shakily and even tears rolled down his face. That satisfied Dean.

He let go of him because he got what he wanted. The boy didn`t hesitate because he ran as fast as he probably could.

Dean watched him but then decided he had to leave before an angry mom would appear. As he was walking with no goal he was quite relieved with himself. He did something good today. For the first time in forever he hadn`t let Sam down. He had helped him.

That brought a smile up on his face. A moment later it faded.

 **That`s it for now. Hope you enjoyed it and maybe you want to share your thoughts with me?**

 **I am quite nervous because of grammar and stuff.**

 **Moreover I am excited to hear from you! :)**


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